Cline, 2008 Ancient Vines Zinfandel

When I tell people that Zinfandel is my favorite varietal, southern housewives seem to second my opinion. Unfortunately, I'm not talking about the pink stuff from the folks down at Sutter Home. No, I'm thinking about something bold, peppery, with a strong alcohol flavor, balanced with a slight fruit note.

That said, just as some people look good on paper, but then just don't produce, so too goes this wine. It comes from a reputable vineyard, with several wines rating 90+ from the more established wine reviewers. It's marketed as "ancient vine," which usually makes me think it will be especially peppery and bold. Maybe 2008 was too wet, and didn't stress the wine sufficiently (unstressed grapes make great jam, but not so much great wine).

This wine wasn't good. It starts off with blackberry, and maybe a bit of plum and a little bit of earthiness, and finishes with... honey? Now, to be fair, it wasn't as sweet as honey, but there was rarely even a note of pepper, and the alcohol was hidden behind the fruit-forward taste. I am disappointed with this wine. I may come back to Cline, but not for this one.

Overall Rating: Fair

Chuck Norris Wine Facts

This one is dedicated to my husband.

Since I can't partake in wine right now, thanks to Baby #2's incubation period, I can only dream about it. I came across this list of Chuck Norris Wine Facts today, and knew my hubby (and likely many of you readers out there) would enjoy:

1. Norris don’t trellis. He drags two men in the vineyard by the hair. One is Scott, the other Henry. The vines have been told.
2. Chuck Norris once ate an entire bucket of Nebbiolo grapes and shat out a beautifully aged Barolo.
3. Chuck Norris loves American oak…and so do you unless you want Chuck Norris to punch a hole through your chest.
4. Chuck Norris has a little winemaker in him. Not because he knows anything about wine, but because he ate Piero Antinori.
5. Chuck Norris’s tears scored 200 points with Wine Enthusiast. Too bad he never cries.
6. Some wines have flavors of earth. Chuck Norris’ wines have flavors of universe.
7. James Laube rates Chuck Norris Cab 88 points blind. 100 points nonblind.
8. Trader Joes is test marketing “Two Buck Chuck Norris” – they are certain it will annihilate the competition.
9. Chuck Norris once consumed a whole case of wine in one sitting. Without opening it.
10. Robert Parker may remember every wine he’s tasted. But, Chuck Norris remembers every wine he hasn’t.
11. Chuck Norris doesn’t let red wine make a move, let alone breathe.
12. Chuck Norris drinks grape juice…..but pees Madeira.
13. Chuck Norris joined Foursquare and is now the Mayor of everything and everywhere. Game over.
14. Chuck Norris’ beard displays aromas of crushed lilacs, chocolate-dipped raspberries and justice.
15. Wine does not stain Chuck Norris’ teeth, out of respect.
16. Chuck Norris does not get drunk from wine. The wine gets drunk from Chuck Norris.
17. Asked if he preferred the old world or new world Chuck Norris was confused, and murdered that man.
18. Chuck Norris once rated a wine a 98. It was later determined that the bottle contained the blood of his enemies children.
19. Chuck Norris once guzzled a double magnum and impregnated 53 women that later gave birth to the 1985 Chicago Bears.

Anybody have a #20?

The Start of Something Maybe Not So Grand... (but fun)

To any wayward internet traveller who has stumbled upon our little blog, please do not be alarmed. We are not self-aggrandizing, arrogant drunks, as one might presume a wine and alcohol blogger to be. Seriously. We're just a couple of winos looking for a way to catalogue our tasting experiences, and, as a happy by-product, provide ourselves with a creative outlet at the same time.

"A man may surely be allowed to take a glass of wine at his own fireside." -Richard Brinsley Sheridan

You said it, Richard. A glass or two of wine and/or Scotch at the end of a long day is our way of unwinding. Some people meditate, some watch TV, some read; we add a splash of something red, white, clear, or tan to the mix. Occasionally, something long-forgotten is remembered along with that glass, at other times, the memorable experience happens over the glass. Sometimes, it's just a drink. We like telling stories though, even if just about what that drink tastes like going down, so here we are.

As a side note, as the title indicates, this is intended to be a couple of winos; however, the Mrs. is currently on hiatus from imbibing, given her most current run with a parasitic organism. We expect the parasite to extricate itself by August, after a luxurious 9-month residence inside my lovely wife. At least, that's how it happened last time. Unfortunately, we have to clothe, feed, and otherwise care for the parasite when he or she is ex vivo, but I digress. She should be back in commission about a year and a half from now. Until then, I'll be drinking for two--I'll survive.

I expect this to be a learning experience for us. Perhaps posterity, or, more likely, I, looking back over the blog, will be able to follow a learning curve evidenced by our posts. Especially with my newly-found enjoyment of Scotch (a logical outcropping from my Bourbon habit picked up at a southern law school), the first posts may be a bit pedantic in their analyses, but if you'll bear with us, things should get better as we figure out what does and does not work.

As the venerable John Cleese of Monty Python once said, "Most of the guests who stay here wouldn't know the difference between Bordeaux and Claret." I'm trying John, I am (and, yes, I do get the joke).

If anyone does happen to read this blog, suggest me something to drink! Better yet, drop me a line and we'll tie one on together. Until then, drink up!